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Dear Samara from one year ago,
Keep. going! Your crazy idea is just crazy enough to be "compelling"! I know it seems--especially in the coming weeks--that grad school is unattainable and that you'll never be allowed back in that world. I know that you're going to go to bed exhausted, bleary-eyed and emotional far too many times. I know that the future seems very dark--that you'll be waiting eternally and that what you've hoped for will never happen. But have faith and take courage, because your hard work will open doors and your faith will be answered.
I know that even now you are considering giving up on OSU--it's the most expensive choice and has the earliest application date. But thank you for not giving up on it, because God knew this interdisciplinary school was exactly where you needed to be. I know that you are going to hear voices--both in your head and from other people--that this idea isn't "academic enough" and that you just don't have it together. But by immense grace and running hard after a dream, somehow it does come together. So don't give up.
As for me, I have to get back to this other crazy paper on Heart of Darkness, Impressionism, and the Lost World (I'm on page 13 of 20 - woohoo!). But keep your chin up, "When the sun shines, it'll shine out the clearer." :)
Graduate Teaching Associate
MA Candidate - Literature and Culture
School of Writing, Literature, and Film
Oregon State University