Thursday, July 26, 2012

Legacies and loss

Walking this day with an aching heart. Words cannot express what we have lost in losing Pastor Dennis Trout. I know that he is whole in the Presence of the Lord--but right now, it is unbearable to think of life without him.

I don't think I exaggerate when I say that Pastor Dennis changed the life of everyone he came in contact with. I know he changed mine. Fourteen years ago when my brother was diagnosed with terminal cancer, he, along with some of the other elders and pastors, came to our house to weep and pray with us. He stood with our family then as well as other dark periods of my life. His teaching on undistracted devotion and Biblical ethics have shaped the very way I view life. He spoke some incredible words that have impacted my life. I remember one chapel message entitled "Chairs" where he talked about the chairs we were destined to sit in one day as well as all the chairs in which we must sit on the journey to that destiny. He was absolutely unique--in fashion, in giving announcements, in reading stories at people's weddings, in doling out calf-raises as "punishment" in class, and just about everything else.
I so appreciate that he made a point of staying in touch with me--asking me every time he saw me, "Still getting me straight A's?" Yes, Pastor Dennis, I got you straight A's and I will continue to do so.
Pastor Dennis, I cannot believe that you are gone. I can't believe there will be no more hugs this side of eternity. I can't imagine family camp without you. I cannot believe that you won't be at my wedding.

But I do know that you were one of the best demonstrations of a father's heart and a principled, laid-down, spirit-led life. You will be so, so missed.

I had the privilege last month of going to see Les Miserables, Pastor Dennis's favorite musical. The finale reminded me of him and his fight and his love. It's been in my head all day.


God on high
Hear my prayer
Take me now
To thy care
Where You are
Let me be
Take me now
Take me there
Bring me home
Bring me home...

Come with me
Where chains will never bind you
All your grief
At last, at last behind you
Lord in heaven; 
Look down on him in mercy

Forgive me all my trespases and take me to your glory

Fantine, Valjean and Eponine:
Take my hand
And lead me to salvation
Take my love
For love is everlasting
And remember
The truth that once was spoken:
To love another person is to see the face of God

Pastor Dennis, thank you will never be enough, but its all I have. Your legacy does not die with you. But I am so happy that you are now with your Creator, basking in His glory.

I love you, Samara


  1. What a wonderful tribute to one of the most amazing men I ever knew!

  2. True words from the heart and it just shows how a father's heart he had and the Father's heart he manifested.
    I remember him also sharing on undivided devotion to God when he came to Christ Church Kisumu in Kenya some years back and the passion and conviction with which he shared.
    The pain of losing him is great but we know he's in a better place with the Father, Son and Holy Ghost.
    Peace, comfort and strength to "mama", "watoto", "wajukuu" and the family @CCKirkland.